Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Booze: Not Just for Saturday Mornings Anymore

In October I noted that Governor Granholm was considering a bill that would allow for Sunday morning liquor sales beginning at 7AM (formerly noon) as well as lift the ban on Christmas Day liquor sales. The bill was not without its issues, and was stalled a bit before a compromise between lawmakers could be reached.

The bill that Granholm finally approved eliminated some of the controversial provisions that were packed into the version she rejected in October. The next hurdle will be in the weeks it will take for bars, restaurants and stores to get the additional $160/year permit that will allow for these early sales. As we are now in the midst of the biggest selling season for booze, businesses desperately want to take advantage of these weeks prior to the observance of the birth of the Purportedly Magical Jew.

For the time being, however, you'll have to get your hair of the dog the old-fashioned way: by drinking the remaining swill from half-empty cans of warm beer that you left sticking to your living room table in puddles of coagulating cheese dip product before you passed out immediately after that last shot of Jameson's and all your friends left you on your floor and you woke up hoping for a merciful death during those seven excruciating minutes between the time you rose from the dead and the time the bars start serving booze so you can drown that vile feeling in tomato-flavored vodka as God intended.

Praise the Lord and pass the vodka!

View the complete details of House Bill 6224 here.